Time change ..sure knows how to fuck you up. Since I’ve been in the US I have been completely in another world , The time change from Australia to the US has thrown me completely out “getting to sleep around 2 or 3 in the morning and up at 7am.. Kinda walking around like a zomby half alsleep with a caffene syringe showed up you’re arse, a coffee is the only thing to get ya movin in the morning the only rank thing is when you get a cup of coffee here they pretty much hand you a 2 litre jug and next minute you’re shittin like you’ve eatin a pack of laccettes and jibber jabbin like a crack head.
I left LA this mornin for NYC super early, had to leave my hotel at 4am bound for New york then Lisbon in Portugal.. Did my usual, stopped in at some road side gas station and got my brewed American coffee “yeh about 2 litres” and headed in the direction of LAX.. the fucked thing was I got on the 405 free way and “oh ohh” push…. Jesus I deadest nearly shit my pants…had to pull into some crook joint cause the French vanilla coffee recommended to me by the 60 soemthin year old lady in seal beach with barely any pegs in her head and hair like straw I swear had been riddled with laccetives..!!!! FUCK… were do you shit AT 4.20AM driving down the 405 freeway to LAX when the nearest sign I just past said “Crenshaw boulevard” fuck I’d hearda that shit in dre dre tracks and N.W.A lyrics when I wasa grommet..this was notorious black ganster neighbour hood.. .. oh fuckin great…… Anyway I pulled in… found the nearest servo , begged the fucker behind the counter for the keys to the shitter “after he told me I must buy soemthin” so fuckin cashews it was.. threew them straight in the bin”..$1.20 shit” and hobbled in like my right foot had been shot with a tazer gun…AHHHHHHHHH fuckiin relief..
Then once it was all over I was thinkin “OH fuck my cars been stolen, my camera shit, the bag of fuckin wetsuits for Kelly & dane I’m takin to Portugal Ahh fuck”.. anyway.. all was good in the end.. I have never driven down any fuckin road in my entire life with such a fuckin smile so big people passing by probably thought “what the fuck is that weirdo smiling so much for at 445am in the fuckin morning.?..”
I got my car dropped off , jumped on the hertz bus and headed for LAX..
More fuckin Lines in that joint than a cocaine party.. HOLY SHIT….!!!
The one thing September 11 did do is fuckin make sure as hell it takes you 2 hours to get through check in to security to get to your fuckin gate..!!! jesus.. I got there in the end..as soon as I did I pretty much crash and burned on the 5 hour flight to new york after shutting out the noisy bitch sitttin next to me from haliewa in Hawaii she was telling me the most pointless shit about her husband, how her family were from queens and brooklyn, how she cashs in when the asp tour comes to town..yadda yadda yadda…… I just reached into my bag grabbed my “Noise cancelling headphones “ and shut her the fuck outta my life and crash and burned.. Next minute I wake up in New york and straight into a Brooklyn LAGER… Ahhh this is the life.. New york city sippin on a fuckin thick Brooklyn beverage.. Portugals only another 8 hours away.. fuckin travellin’ s good shit.. LETS ROLLL another day another Adventure..!! what will tomorrow bring..?.. who fuckin know>>>As long as the beers cold. We’re all good.>>!!!!!!!